Reflections on resolutions

Well, first let me wish you all a very happy, and healthy, and wonderful New Year--a few days late!

As I watch others though, planning their goals and lists for 2013, I've been thinking about mine. The year's beginning does seem like a good time to take stock of our lives, where we're going, what our priorities are, if we're succeeding at what we want to succeed at. It's good for us to take the time to sit down and evaluate it. Though, personally, I think it ought to be done way more than just once a year! A year is a LONG time to keep everything in perspective. Especially when we're constantly bombarded with so many things seeking to pull us away from what our heart desires. Do we want a closer walk with God? Social media, telephone calls, activities we must attend or plan or prepare for, all steal time and energy from seeking God. Do we want to make sure our children are trained in the way they should go? Wow, that's takes TIME! And lots of thought and wisdom. There are so many things out there calling for our time and energies to be poured into other things! A good marriage is the basis of a happy family. Are we actively protecting our marriage, and our relationships with our children, from the ever so subtle influences that are deliberately designed to tear us apart? Are we soaking up the truths that God shows us in His Word, that combat the influences of our day? Wow, I could go on a long, long time on that one!

But I do feel that so much of the New Years resolutions hoopla can't be all that healthy. Our bodily health is tied in to our emotional and spiritual health more than we often realize. What is one of the most common resolutions you hear of? Yes, losing weight! We've already discussed that in another blog entry, so if that's a resolution you've made go read that one. :-) But what usually happens? Someone makes that resolution, fired usually by a few pounds gained over the holidays. Horrified, they are determined that those pounds are coming off. So they work diligently at their diet, or exercise, or whatever other way they've chosen to battle the bulge. Some must buy memberships at clubs, or buy exercise equipment, from all the ads you see for such places popping up all over. It lasts for awhile. They might actually lose a little. But then, life just keeps happening, and all those resolutions and determinations fall by the wayside. Suddenly, it's spring (if it even takes that long!) and you realize that resolution has disappeared. I don't know about you, but about that time I start feeling discouraged. I just can't do it (whatever "it" might be--not always weight loss!) and so why try? It creates such a defeat in our spirits, and can cause an underlying tension as we're feeling like we can't cut it. It's not always just a new year that brings that kind of high-low experience. I've seen people do the same thing when they come across some great new teaching or tactic to address a problem. Often it involves buying or making something new in order to get started. But soon, the newness wears off, it's harder to actually do than you thought it would be, and it falls by the wayside. Another failure to chalk up to yourself, and your spirit wilts some more. Been there, done that.

So, how do we combat the tension created by the high-low cycle of resolution and failure? One way is to not make resolutions. And maybe, in some areas, that may just be the best thing to do. Another way, that I've found to be quite effective, is to lower the resolution. My goal: a cleaner, neater home for my family. That's a great goal, and providing a neat, restful atmosphere in the home is so good for us! But if I start by cleaning the whole house and expect to keep it clean, it won't happen. I've tried it, lots. So I know I'm setting myself up for failure to try that again. So, what's a manageable step in that direction, one that I can see if I'm making progress with? How about, making the bed every morning? Remember, it takes about a month to make a new habit. So the goal for the next month is to make the bed every day after I fix my hair. And then, yes, I can do that! And I did it. I found it helped to tie it in with something I already do every day, so then it's easier to remember. And it's just a little thing, taking about a minute to toss those covers up. But it does make our room look so much neater. Win-win! Another thing I've worked on is throwing away the trash when I'm cooking or baking. So many times I feel like I'm in such a hurry doing this project, but once it's in the oven I'll have time to clean up. With three small children in the house? Hah! As soon as I can be free, I'm needed somewhere else--five minutes ago! My husband is the one who saw this and encouraged me to just throw the trash away as I make it. Crack an egg? Toss the shell! Empty a can? Rinse and put it in the recycle. Right now. This wasn't as easy a habit as the bed, as it isn't so noticeable and harder to remember. BUT there's rarely just trash laying around the kitchen anymore. Ok, there's still dirty dishes and floury counters, but no more trash. I praise the Lord for bringing me that one little step closer to my goal! Now for the current habit to build: clean and wash off the table after EVERY meal as soon as it's over. . . Nothing big, just one little baby step at a time. At this rate, yes, it's going to take a long time. But it's ever so much better than setting lofty goals I'll never reach, causing stress and frustration and depression.

And the other big part of it, is to keep seeking the Lord and His will. He has promised to give wisdom to those who ask for it! So let's ask. Every day. "Lord, what is Your goal for me today? Oh, grant me wisdom to do it!" So many times we get caught up with our goals and our stuff, and then find ourselves overwhelmed with too much. Let's take one moment at a time and with every step ask, "Lord, what now?" He is faithful!